We all know the typical clichés about filling your cup, using the oxygen mask first when the plane’s going down, and filling our tank before we run on fumes. Albeit cliché, there’s a reason for these phrases. We owe it to others to give the best care to ourselves so we can give others the best care we can give. Read it again. We can’t help anyone else as our best selves until we start treating ourselves as if we deserve it.
Self-care is the latest buzz phrase, and I’m all for it. But what does self-care mean? We’ve got to be careful we don’t blur the lines between self-care and self-indulgence.
Care is defined by dictionary.com as “the provision of what’s necessary for the health, welfare, maintenance, and protection of someone or something.” Indulge is defined as “allow oneself to enjoy the pleasure of.”
One is necessary to sustain a healthy life. The other is typically harmless if done every now and then but could potentially become hazardous.
Self-care is not having a glass or two of wine after a hard day. It’s not picking up an ice-cream cone of your favorite flavor at the local parlor. It’s not ordering take-out from the fast food joint down the street. It’s not binge watching hours of the latest Netflix series. It’s not ordering hundreds of dollars of clothes as retail therapy.
All of these things prevent you from being productive in one way or another. They’re fine to do as an indulgence–a rare treat to yourself, but if these things or some other similar activities are how you’re “taking care of yourself,” you’re doing more harm than good.
Imbibing prevents you from getting stuff done around the house and actually hinders your rest at night. Even the smallest intake of alcohol affects your body’s sleep. Retail therapy may make you feel good when the packages arrive on your front porch, but does your wallet feel the effects of it later? Eating junk food prevents your productivity in taking care of your health–the exact opposite of what self-care is supposed to do. If you wake up the next day regretting your decisions from the night before, you are not doing yourself any good.
We must be mindful of the things we do and how they will help or hinder us in the long run. Self-care does not mean spending hundreds of dollars at the spa or nail salon–of course that can be one person’s definition. It does not have to be that complicated though. Below are FREE self-care ideas that will rest your body and mind.
| Take a walk | Take a hot bath | Listen to Music |
| Meditate | Read a book | Pray |
| Write in a journal | Play board games | Do a puzzle |
| Exercise | Cook a meal | Spend time playing with kids |
| Go on a date | Call a friend | Color or doodle |
| Pet your dog | Play cards | Take a nap |
| Do a craft or knit/sew | Do brainteasers or Sudoku | Bake cookies or bread |
None of these things listed above should incite anger, irritability, sadness, or stress.
I know what you’re thinking right now–ok, this all sounds great, but who has the time for any of that? The truth is if you don’t make time, you’ll see the negative effects later. Our bodies and minds were not created to be on overdrive as society tries to make us believe. I’m sure you spend plenty of time on social media. Cut out some time scrolling through foodie instagram pics and start feeding your soul with things that will really make you full.
Start small. You’ll never be able to just drop everything immediately to focus on yourself, nor should you. Look at your schedule and really focus on ONE thing you can cut out. Once you decide what that is, replace it with your self-care activity. If your original obligation that you dropped was an hour, spend an hour on yourself. Commit to this for a period of time, and reflect on how you feel.
You’re worth it, and no one can or should tell you otherwise. Use your oxygen, fill your tank, or whatever else you want to call it. Remember–we owe it to others to give the best care of ourselves so we can give others the best care we can give.
